Oscar the Grouch

Dear Neighbors,

My backyard, despite what you may think, or may have convinced yourself is a good idea, is NOT your personal garbage dumping ground.

I seriously find crap like this all over my backyard, every day. It's disgusting.

Also, (you know who you are), letting your kids play with fireworks in your backyard is a TERRIBLE idea. I really don't want the entire neighborhood to burn down.

Sincerely, Oscar the Blonde Grouch